BAR

PARODY OF WAR

SUNDAE FUDGY SUNDAE

SECONDS (THE BUFFET SONG)

NEW YEAR’S DAZE

LIKE IT STRONG...

BROWNING PAN

THE REFUSEE

TWO PARTS: MEAT AND BUN

RED BULL

BARTENDER

‘40 OZ.’

MARCH 1983

UCHEW's third album, BAR, was released in March 1983, and featured little Peter Rowan drinking under age on the cover and a new, more martial sound. After having a frozen treat while dieting slapped out of a hand by a disapproving spouse, lead single SUNDAE FUDGY SUNDAE was written to convey the tragedy of that dark day at Dairy Queen.

The album fueled UCHEW's growing popularity, leading to playing bigger venues and culminating in the legendary concert at Red Rocks, considered to be a breakthrough performance for the band!

BAR is seen as one of UCHEW's best albums, containing such classics as NEW YEAR'S DAZE and TWO PARTS: MEAT AND BUN.

"More than any other record, 'BAR' is right for its time. It is a slap in the face against the snap, crackle and pop of breakfast." – Bonneeau

SUNDAE FUDGY SUNDAE

PARODY OF SUNDAY BLOODY SUNDAY

I can’t believe I chose today

To close my eyes and send it back its way

How long?

How long must I not eat what’s wrong?

How long?

Cuz tonight I can’t order one

Tonight...

Caramel streaks under toffee treat

Chocolate chunks of marbled candy sweets

But I won’t heed the hunger call

It puts my weight back up

Got to lose some weight before the fall

Sundae, fudgy sundae

And the diet’s just begun

The weight’s been lost but tell me who has fun?

There’s no satisfaction in my heart

No marshmallows?

Mints?

Nuts?

Or licorice?!

I’m torn apart!

Sundae, fudgy sundae

How long?

How long must I not eat what’s wrong?

How long?

Cuz tonight....

I’m not having fun tonight

Tonight...

Sundae, fudgy sundae

Wipe the tears from my eyes

Wipe my tears away

I'll wipe my tears away

I'll wipe my tears away (sunday, fudgy sundae)

I'll wipe my bloodshot eyes (sunday, fudgy sundae)

No sundae, fudgy sundae

Oh, wipe those tears away

No Sundae, fudgy sundae

And it’s true you can have one soon

But lose the fat before that’s reality

And today the calories are why

You eat and eat and tomorrow you sigh

Sundae, fudgy sundae

The real battle just begun

To claim the victory over your bum

Over…

Sundae, fudgy sundae

TRACK 1

SINGLE RELEASED MARCH, 1983

LYRICS BY BONNEEAU

MUSIC BY UCHEW

SECONDS

(THE BUFFET SONG)

PARODY OF SECONDS

I’ll take seconds

My appetite’s

Unsatisfied...

Oh, oh, oh...

I’ll take seconds

My appetite’s

Unsatisfied...

Unsatisfied....

Oh, oh, oh...

Gonna get some more chow

Corned beef hash

Has caught my eye

Chicken breast: baked or fried

Lots of meat under hot lights

Salad bar just to the right

Haul...

Rise and haul...

Rise and...

There are butter mints

And fudge squares

Pecan pies

And cakes to spare

Helped myself to the souffle

A lineup to the buffet

I see ducks carved!

Nanaimo bars!

Cross buns!

Roast pork!

Shrimp rings!!

And I would bet...

There’s even wings!!!

Haul...

Rise and haul...

Rise and....

Unsatisfied...

Unsatisfied

Unsatisfied...

Unsatisfied

Appetite

I’ll take seconds

My appetite’s

Unsatisfied...

Oh, oh, oh...

Lamb or mutton

Beer by the jug

Unsatisfied

Oh, oh, oh...

Haul...

Rise and haul...

Rise and...

Again I rise and haul...

I rise and haul

And before they think we’re done

I think it’s time

We both dine & run

Yes, before our server comes

Well...

After a plate of prawns

Unsatisfied...

Unsatisfied

Appetite

TRACK 2

LYRICS BY BONNEEAU

MUSIC BY UCHEW

NEW YEAR’S DAZE

PARODY OF NEW YEAR’S DAY

All will diet on New Year's Day

A world contrite gets underway

I want to be with food

Be with food night and day

Nothing changes

On New Year's Day

I...will be with food again

Under a blood red dye

Unbowed, I lathered some snacks with bite

Arms entwined ill chosen food

The newspaper says, says

Say it's true, it's true...

That there’s a breakthrough

Though shorn junk food

It can’t be shunned

I...I will be thin again

Oh, oh...oh

Oh...oh, oh

Oh, maybe the time ain’t right

Oh, maybe not quite

I...will be with food again

And so we are told this is the Gluten Age

And Gluten’s the reason for the stores we gauge

Though I want to be with food

Be with food night and day

Nothing changes

On New Year's Day

TRACK 3

SINGLE RELEASED JANUARY, 1983

LYRICS BY BONNEEAU

MUSIC BY UCHEW

LIKE IT STRONG...

PARODY OF LIKE A SONG...

Like it strong enough to sting

And sting when I poo

Like those turds to make me wring

My hands at the loo

And it's better laced with pain

We're talking flames

Constitution test again

Yeah, I want...

I want heat that I can't relieve

I can eat through

Mere indigestion

And I sure won't seek reprieve

Too bold?

I won't fold

The gauntlet that I threw!

No bite?

My sorrow's your fate!

And I love to swear and curse

Up a storm

You won't catch me cry and gag

And I won't

Plead 'Mother' as eyes well

In my insides

Pain like no other

Won't sweat through the blaze

Like lye-in-burn range

If white hot

I'd prolong

You dare call this strong?!

You've new hells?

Bring out!

High Scovilles?

I'm stout!

Is there feeling left

Is there

Is there feeling

Is there feeling left

Third degree burns' what I want

An immolation that's not tame

Stripped of burns

Nothing refused

Nothing but pain

Nothing banal

Yeah, just please try to top yourself

Would rather burns like lyme

You say this time it's gold

A war crime

With a White Phosphorus bite

It's strong

But only slight

Black Arts are what I need

Roughshod?

I'll accede

Evil?

It's bereft!

TRACK 4

LYRICS BY BONNEEAU

MUSIC BY UCHEW

BROWNING PAN

PARODY OF DROWING MAN

Take my pan

You know I’ve cookware

If you can

I’d toss or try be rid of

For I have promised

For it need no use tonight

And for the times that guests come

Take my pan

You know it’ll heat fare

If you can

I’d toss in something you love

And I understand

The winds and tides

These changing times

Won’t drag you to pay

Hold on

And hold on tightly

Hold on

And don’t let go of handle

This warms quite fast

It won’t be long now

This thing will last...

This thing will last forever!

And take my pan

Your faux cheap cookware

If you can

You’ll toss or try to rid of

Give you what I hold dear

TRACK 5

LYRICS BY BONNEEAU

MUSIC BY UCHEW

THE REFUSEE

PARODY OF THE REFUGEE

Woah, woah…

She is the refusee

I see her plate

I see her plate returning back to me

Woah, woah…

She is the refusee

The waiter says one day

He’s gonna finally snap

In the meantime

She is waiting

Waiting for the next dish

To send

Send away

Woah, woah…

The papaya garnish’s poor

If it’s not right

She’s calling for the manager

Woah, woah…

The waiter is getting sore

He says that one day he’s gonna

Really make her pay

In the meantime

She is waiting

Waiting for the waiter to

Bring her another plate

And utensils cleaned by hand

Woah, woah…

Another dish we waste

She’s OCD’ing

All over the place

Woah, woah…

Another dish we waste

Now the waiter he says

He just can’t take her crap

Woah, woah…

She is the refusee

I see her plate

I see her plate returning back to me

Woah, woah…

She is the refusee

The waiter says today

She’s going to get a slap

TRACK 6

LYRICS BY BONNEEAU

MUSIC BY UCHEW

TWO PARTS:

MEAT AND BUN

PARODY OF TWO HEARTS BEAT AS ONE

You don’t know

You don’t know which side of bun

Does the meat go right or left?!

You won’t last here long!

They say you’re in school

They say you’re learning

But since you’re new here

I’ll stress one thing...

Two parts: meat and bun

Two parts...

This ain’t rocket science

Trainee, this is your last chance!

Add bread to meat: sandwich!

Maybe you don’t grasp the nuance!

Two parts: meat and bun

Two parts...

Meat on bun?!

Meat on right!

Meat then cheese

Just get it right!

Meat on you?

Meat on me?!

Meat on floor?!!

Arrgh!

I don’t know what to say

Were your folks inbred?’

I don’t expect you to be that bright

But it seems you’re brain dead

For a pickle in every bite

Repeat as I do

Condiments are strictly rationed

Onions you’ll add a smear

Dispenser’s pump action

Put mustard and ketchup here

Two parts: meat and bun

Two parts...

You don’t know

You don’t know which side of bun

Does the meat go right or left

You won’t last here long

They say you’re in school

They say you’re learning

But since you’re new here

I’ll stress one thing...

Two parts: meat and bun

Two parts...

I’ve tried to spell it out

I can’t explain it simpler:

Crown!

Meat!

Heel!

Oh, yeah...

That’s three parts!

Well, I can't stop to glance